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Original song Pilate's Dream
Original artist Rice and Lloyd-Webber
Filk author Guy L. Steele Jr.

PLIate's Dream

[to be sung to the tune of Pilate's Dream
from Jesus Christ Superstar]

I dreamed I was a brand new language,
The ultimate in speed;
I handled strings as fast as RPG,
And twice as easily.

I crunched numbers like COBOL,
Trees like APL,
And FORTRAN loaned its FORMATs and GO TOs,
The cause of many screws.

And then a man said, "Now we'll write a monitor,
With Multics what it's for.
Our project is begun;
We'll code in PL/I."

Then I saw thousands of coders
Searching for their bugs,
And then I heard them mentioning my name
And leaving me the blame.

-- The Great Quux
(with apologies to Rice and Webber)

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